The Scarlet Letter Report

Jun. 16 – Jun. 20

This must be about the fifth introduction I’ve written for this report. It seems I’m having some kind of writer’s block today. Argh. Well, each one I wrote just didn’t seem right. The Emp bashing intro just wasn’t cutting it. The Chef “Z” serving up a plate of report wasn’t hip. The TENAN Report just wasn’t quite game. So I decided to go with the subtle approach. Just start typing and whatever comes out of it is going into the report. Sounds like a good idea eh? Maybe this could be some new type of renovation for reports all across America and the World. I can see the headlines now, “Zarek and a community website, dragonmount.com, renovate the world of reporting!” Oh yeah, this report is just the first step towards world domination….

But unfortunately, I expect that you all came to receive a report, no? As much as I’d like to ramble on about my plans for domination…erm… I mean peace and love. Work just has to come before play. Down to business as my great-great grandpappy “Z” would say.

* sets his feet up on his desk, cracks his fingers, and begins to write *

We’re back into the full swing of things here at dragonmount.com. The regular flood of newbies asking questions and oldbies answering them are all back. To my own surprise I noticed that many orgs didn’t miss a step through the transition from the Ezboards back to DM’s. Ezboards…* shudders *.

Through the downtime I believe I realized just how important this little website is to everybody. I don’t think there was one second that went by in chat when I didn’t hear somebody groaning about no getting their Scarlet Letter Report…uh, I mean… not being able to access the boards of course. Yeah, that’s what I meant. Anyway, I’d like to thank Jon personally because I know he’s just working his arse off behind the scenes of DM. So all of you… send him flowers, chocolates, and energy drinks.

Well, I’m kind of in a weird mood this morning so I think instead of going in order of the orgs I’ll mix em up a little bit. Maybe by distracting my mind with something else I can hold the hunger from not eating breakfast at bay. Just maybe.

Starting out with the Wolfbrothers, it’s the basic thing over there that has been happening at every org board for all I can see. There’s about 20-25 posts by people jumping for joy that the boards are back up. The wolf’s are just glad because, and I quote Nighteyes on this, “We can finally drink in public again!!!!”. I don’t know about these boys but I really do think a party is in need to celebrate DM being up for over a week now!

The wolf’s RP also starts back up and the “Omnipresent” Arminius returns with his brand new comp. * waves a little flag *

Hmmm… Which board am I gonna visit next. What do you say? Where do you think I’m going?

Next up is the Whi…eel of Time Artists. This would have to be my favorite org of the week. My intentions when DM came back up were to wait a while so the boards could fill back up so I could actually have some info to put in this report. Well the WoT artists are the contradiction of my theory. They had one post on their OOC board when I checked it. So I want to send a big thanks out to the Artists, you make my job a whole lot easier. * eg *

Skipping over to the CoL we see that Tenan guy again. Now Tenan was the last few weeks official spammer. Tenan is claiming the CoL land for his own. I couldn’t let this happen of course. You can’t claim a land that’s already been claimed. It’s just not right. It’s in the rules too afterall. So, I got a couple words for that crazy bander… Viva la Spamchan! Enough advertising for the coolest org at DM though… back to the CoL. Gib Ekim has decided to start on the journey of righteousness, and cleanse the CoL of all DF’s…. Good luck Gib, but we all know that the CoL and SG are best friends. …. And so along came more spam. Naven, thought that it was possible for a mere mortal in the spam kingdom to create a new line of spam. Well, perhaps he did… but I deem this spam “The Spam that takes 10 minutes to Read”.

Sea Folk. That’s about all I have to say. Frid4y and Kora make their appearances… Like they did on the rest of DM. My theory for not seeing any SF posts is: They are hiding on their private boards. Come out little fishies. * throws a hook and worm in the water *

The next org is one of the ones I was talking about in the beginning. One of the orgs that didn’t stop working throughout the transition between DM and the Ezboards.

El Lazo del Rojo Mano – The Band of the Red Hand are as busy as every. Mysie, the cute lil devil dropped by the board just to let all know that she’s still around. Rae shows off the new icon she received. Whoop! When’s the next party though….?

In the name of the Robertus we prance over to the Black Tower next to see what’s happening with the org of immense numbers. As soon as the board loaded for the first time I could see the BT love being spread about, like strawberry jam. Along with a little love came a whole lotta newbies. Newbies galore! What goes up must come down though. With the newbies coming a couple of Bters put themselves on leave. One thing I saw though, that is always good, was the fact that with all the newbies the BT didn’t come up short with people that jumped right up to be the first to help these people. Good spirit chaps. Good spirit indeed.

July is Black Tower month here at DM yet Dali still needs ideas. If any of you have any ideas I’m sure he’d be glad to listen. I believe his email is Error! Bookmark not defined. If that isn’t it, than it should be on the staff page. * shrugs *. A couple of other people return to the BT, including some strapping young male * points to himself * that after a good 6 months has decided to try out a second BT character. Oh yeah… Garen returned too.

Delthor now leads the FD RP, posts are on the South board. Sharaza spreads a little more strawberry jam.

Freelanders. It seems the Freelanders and the Sea Folk have the same strategy The Freelanders though are clearly hiding on their private boards because they are in fear of the mighty spam of the Troublesome Trio. Yessss… that’s it.

This next org is the one I dread the most when I am going to go do this report. Reason #1, the board takes an hour to load. Reason #2, the reason behind the slow loading… all the posts.

I know you know what org that is. Those puddin` lovin ladies at the WT know how to post. I think they just love to talk so they can hear their own voices. Muahahahahahahahaaha!!! In any effect I still gotta check this board so I can bring to you all the latest jazz and all that good stuff. I was skimming along and I came across a post by Tiili. I just wanted to answer her question. Yes, this is the WT. There’s a couple new novices running about without a chain around their neck…erm, I mean. Without a… mentor… to teach them. Or something. Hopefully there will be some order restored with the return of one of the WT’s offshoot ajahs. That’s right people… People are glad, the Black is bad, but the PLAID IS BACK!!!!

Taya Gille sends greeting from Melbourne! “Fly like an eagle….” * whistles to self *

Uh, yeah. ….right. Ok, I couldn’t occupy myself enough to finish the report. * munches on cereal for lunch * Short intermission.

K, back to report. Shayol Ghul who’s yo daddy?!?!?! Ermm…. Gon Trevil is a DF?!?!?! Traitor! Get him! Muahahahahahahaaha! Oh wait… this is SG. Doh!

Tys al’Chera proclaims himself the darkest friend of them all, then goes on to say he is a good DF. So confusing. Tasslehoff proclaims he is back… uh yeah… along with about, oh, I’d say… the other 99.9% of DM.

And that brings me to the home of Poo and PooAnn. My favorite Ogiers. Even though they may stink, as long as I think of happy places when they are around it doesn’t so much bother me. Oh yeah… and Fred too.

The Warders!!!! * shrugs * Elessar leads in a riddle game on the Warder’s OOC, for those who have read the whole series. Along with another ABC game… Now only if they could count. Along with the Riddle Game, the ABC game, Elessar also leads the org with Fantasy stories. Ben “Thanks for your cooperation” –T-Gaidin has been watching a little too much Robocop. Along with some newbies needing some help Siofra is looking for DM warders, cookies and pudding at the front desk.

The next two includes one of my favorite orgs… and their best rival. Although they may be the best rival, they are nowhere near being THE best. Muahahahahahaaha! So that didn’t make any sense… sue me, it made sense in my mind.

The Seanchan happens to be my fav org… who woulda guessed. There’s a couple newbies swimming about the waters of the Seanchan. The hot topic though is the Aiel spam. Even though it’s not Grade A “Z” approvable spam the lack of resistance is pitiful. Bah, I say!!! Where are my Spamchan?!?!?!

The Aiel on the other hand, which is the last org report here tonight, have been busy on both the SC board and their own. There is a new prank class beginning via Maria that may be a little fun to read. Drop by, I don’t think you can sign up but who says you couldn’t learn anything from watching. Tasslehoff is now taking bets for the Spam war between the Aiel and the Spamchan. Nadoc Karede and Aissa layeth the smacketh down upon the Aiel, in the name of the might Spamchan. We are the Spamchan. Resistance is futile.

Like you may have noticed and I said earlier, the DM boards are back! Not the new, improved boards though. These are still the same old boards from before. Jon was considerate enough to bring them back for us and still continue work on the new ones. I have trust in Jon that they will not take much longer. Perhaps I can get you an update on that situation next weekend.

Phoenix was right when he said that the weekly columns are once again weekly. * eg * Speaking of the big blue cheese. Our site director and creator, Phoenix, will be getting hitched in but a few weeks. Thus will start the lockdown of his freedom and life overall! Muahahahahahahaaha!

There will be a Chicago DM meet on July 14th… Details on the GCD board.

Now is the part that I know you have all been waiting for. The Scarlet Letter Weekly Awards!!!! Whoop!

Last week, Furry was Dm’s most eligible bachelor. This week’s winner is…. * drum roll *

Demandred!!! MUAHAHAHAHAHAAHA!

The next award is a new one… Along with the most eligible bachelor, we need a most eligible bachelorette… Myriam, I promised you a part in this report. * g *

The Official DM spammer award was awarded to Tenan last week, this week I’d like to grant this honor to Maxic. That NiNiNiNiNi! Stuff is bordering on the line of being spam or not but the fact that you did it so many time and it gave me a headache to see all of it on the SC board…. You deserve this one.

History is made here this week as I give out the fourth award. In the few weeks that the Scarlet Letter report has been out nobody has managed to capture two awards in one week. This week that has changed. The Sir Nonsense award goes out to… Maxic. I really thought if I saw any more of that Ni stuff my head would explode.

The next one goes out to the Pudding Queen. Kat, you definitely deserve the “Lemon” Award. You didn’t so much as start the biggest thread with a nonsense post but your raising posts started the biggest thread that I could see.

This next part is the last of the SL report for this week. It’s called a little shoutouts to the people that begged and pleaded to have their name in this report.

OranjHipo, a shoutout goes out to you because you said by putting your name in the report you’d help me bring the intelligence level of DM down. I believe you. * eg *

Tenan, I know you were mentioned a lot above but I think that I got an ICQ from you everyday asking in some way about the Report.

Viggy, my man. The Vigster! The Viggymiester! You don’t think I’d actually forget about you? Did you? You’re going in this report… 1, because I’m your uncle “Z”. 2, because I’ve never been threatened by a kid that if I didn’t put his name in the report he’d beat me up. Lol

* waves goodbye *

Thank you and goodnight!

Zarek-

Brandon-