Nurit: Good evening, everybody. I am here once again, to open your eyes to the real and exciting world of the WoT characters. Who did what? Who said what? Who farted and let Lan take the blame? Let me open the skeleton closet and smack you with some pelvic bones. Now, please, welcome our one and only, our very own, Perrin Golden Eyes!

*Perrin comes onto the stage and sits down*

Perrin: That was quite a speech, Nurit. Oh, and Lord.

Nurit: Lord what?

Perrin: Lord Perrin Golden Eyes. God would be nice too, but I guess compromise is the way of life.

Nurit: Well, aren’t we the confident ones. What brought up this personality change, Perrin?

Perrin: I finally grew a pair, that’s what.

Nurit: Yes. I’m trying to think about something cruder, but yeah…nothing comes to mind. So, I’ll just let it slide and move on. So, how did it feel the first time you realized you were…different?

Perrin: It was hard. I suddenly realized that I was going through some changes. I had different urges, different cravings. But there was no turning back. I couldn’t resist it. I had to admit to myself that I’m….attracted to men.

Nurit: You’re what?!?!

Perrin: Why do you look so surprised? You asked about it, so I assumed you knew.

Nurit: I was talking about you being able to talk to wolves O_O

Perrin: Oh, that! Just woke up one day and, surprise! yellow uber cool eyes. Plus I get to eavesdrop on wolfie love conversations. They are a horny bunch.

Nurit: How did Faile take up the news about you being…gay?

Perrin: Faile?

Nurit: Yes, Faile. Your wife. She was kidnapped and you gathered an army to rescue her, remember?

Perrin: Oh, that. I was going through a phase. Done now *smiles*

Nurit: So, you’re going to leave her to her fate?

Perrin: *looks at his notebook* Yes.

Nurit: What is that notebook?

Perrin: Oh, this is my answer notebook. Sometimes I get blackouts and slow thinking so I have some general responses written down to help me in times of crisis.

Nurit: What kind of responses?

Perrin: Oh, the usual. Yes, no, perhaps, moo.

Nurit: *raises an eyebrow* Moo?

Perrin: *LMAO* people always fall for that.

Nurit: *Readjusts her glasses* What’s with WoT characters and lame jokes? *shakes head* So, how did you first realize you were attracted to men?

Perrin: Pfft… have you seen any sane woman in the whole WoT series?

Nurit: Good point.

Perrin: Yes, and unless your true and most deep desire is to become a butt monkey, by all means, date one of those creepy women.

Nurit: Is that written in your note book?

Perrin: *half grin* Yes.

Nurit: Do you miss your old days as a blacksmith?

Perrin: At times.

Nurit: Do you wish you never met Rand? That way you wouldn’t be involved in all of this?

Perrin: Are you kidding me? Did you see that red sexy hot momma…. He can be my dragon reborn any day, if you know what I mean.

Nurit: Well, I’m working on repressing that right now, so I’ll get back to you on that.

Perrin: Perfect!

Nurit: Do you have any comments about Berelain perhaps?

Perrin: That little saucy wench. Now that’s a woman who doesn’t know the meaning of no. Dig her outfits, though. I bet that white fluffy number would look great on me.

Nurit: I’m sure it would. *shudders*

Perrin: A shiver of excitement, Nurit? I’m sorry, I’m spoken for. Javier gets extremely jealous. He loves it when I put on my speedos and smack his…

Nurit: Would you look at that, we’re out of time! Thank you for coming, Perrin. It’s okay, we won’t make that mistake again.

Perrin: Oh, it’s quite all right. And next time you interview Randy poo please let me know. *purrs*

Nurit: O_O Not seeing that happening any time soon, but sure thing.

Perrin: Goodnight everyone! *sends a kiss to Javier and smacks his ass*

Nurit: Until next time, everyone *wink*

Nyn