TRAGEDY HAS OCCURRED!! Asmodean, the cute lil’ harp player, who just HAPPENS to be a Forsaken, was found dead. DEAD! Such travesty! How did it happen? Who would want this sweet lil’ man, who JUST happens to have tortured and killed many other innocents, dead?

Follow our two investigators, Charis Jr. and Little Miss, as they go around torturing interrogating interviewing the key suspects at DM. Every few months, we will feature a brand new mystery. Each issue, we will let you know of the next witness and you will get to submit a question, and the top 1 to 2 questions will be featured in the issue. And at the end of it, YOU will get to vote as to who committed the crime.

Needless to say, punishments will follow. Hands cuffed, feet tickled, much torturing and rejoicing all around. It will be a party! A CASEFILES party! So, let’s start this week with the 2 people who were closest to the scene of the crime. Our Keeper of the Chronicles and Editor in Chief, Elgee, and her right-hand man(A very dodgy job title, if you ask me) Boopsy Sedai(Also a very dodgy name, if you ask me)!

Elgee’s Holiday Interrogation:

Hello folks!  *cue spot light, on occupied comfy chair* Crystal Lynn reporting here, to bring you the most informing, most exciting, and most action-packed peek into our esteemed and beloved Keeper’s Holiday Social Life!

Knocking on the door to the Keeper’s study I wait for an answer; after not receiving an answer I shrug and figure that I might as well let myself in and take a seat while waiting for her eventual return.  Glancing around I notice two things immediately, one is the very large amount of red colored furnishings and the second being that the poor woman’s desk was covered in mounds of paper work.  Only seeing one chair in front of her desk and deciding that it looks extremely hard and uncomfortable, I pass it up in favor of pacing the otherwise homey office.

Walking past the desk, I know not to go through her paper work… but somehow I still manage to get a tiny glimpse of a paper with the words “whip, paddle, whipped cream, and rum” jotted on it…Going red faced I decided it’s in my health’s better interest to not stay by that side of the room.  After a few more minutes, Elgee walks in and we sit down and have some tea before getting down….. to business that is.

Taking a sip of tea, I ask an age-old question,

Q. So Miss Elgee, Holiday Fruit Cake or Not to Holiday Fruit Cake?

Her prompt reply was:

A. I’m an all-year-round Fruit Cake.

Shuddering with disgust and internally cringing, I immediately ask the next question.

Q. If you could design one cheesy Christmas sweater, how would you describe it?

Deciding that as the Keeper, she was too good for the likes of ‘cheesy’ and was a sensible woman with ‘tastes’ (Like fruitcake -_-), she says:

A. I don’t do cheesy … lol

Sighing over the not-so-exciting answer, I decided to press the issue a little more.

Q. So just go with it for a moment and pretend that you had made one, kk?  Who would you make wear the atrocity sweater?

She thinks for all of two seconds, before her superimposed horns stick out and replies:

A. Kara, for sure *grins evilly*

We both giggle till we’re out of breath before getting back on track.

Q. So there are plenty of holiday traditions in the world, like decorating a Christmas tree, “The Santa Clause” and such; what holiday tradition do you feel you most resemble?

She eyes the top drawer of her desk (no doubt where the aforementioned rum is held) while pretending to think, and answers with a big grin:

A. Probably the hangover.

Ahhhh!  Now it all makes sense…the whip…the rum…  I mean…  Anyways…  Let’s move to the final question shall we?

Q. All righty Elgee!  This is the last question for the interview so really give it to us!    What wintertime holiday do you celebrate, and what is the most important/fun/meaningful part?

Smiling and taking a moment to compose her last answer she replies:

A. I’m in the southern hemisphere – we don’t really have holidays in winter.  But I LOVE winter, so I think the whole of it should be a holiday *nods*. If you are referring to the Funny Season: we don’t really celebrate, just get together as a family and stuff our faces.

“Stuffing our faces.”  Spoken like a true woman who knows how to celebrate right!  Never mind the rum!  It’s the food that’s the important part!  ^^

As I walked over to the quarters of Boopsy Sedai, something smacked me RIGHT IN THE BRAIN. I had utterly forgotten to ask Elgee about Asmodean! Light, what a brain fart. It was the rum. IT WAS THE RUM. As I squatted in a corner clutching my head, and ignoring the looks of passing Novices, I mumbled the various curses against all alcohol in general. Then when I decided enough time had passed, I stood up and continued my skipping over to Boopsy’s quaint little palace room, tra-la-laing as I went along. I was NOT disappointed to see the moat, tall towers rising to the sky and his gorgeous garden. These facts all announced one fact– announced it as well as trumpet fanfares could as I approached.

I knew I had reached the Quarters of Boopsy Sedai.

Boopsy’s Tell All Exclusive!

Well now!  Fancy meeting you here!  I thought you’d NEVER show up…  So I guess you being here means that you want the down and dirty facts on the ever infamous and ever lovable Boopsy Kins right? Right?! *narrows eyes* -_- Great!

Now…let’s get to why you came!

This was the day… the BIG day…the one where the horrific honest truth would come out on our dear Blue Aes Sedai.

I knew I had reached the quarters of Boopsy Sedai when I find it decked out in various hues of tastefully matching blues… although the dead giveaway way was the silk pillows strewn over the place…with the occasional fluffy one as well…Poking around a little, I find my victim interviewee sprawled on an overly large pile of cushions while some poor novice (who’s name will not be mentioned for the sake of privacy) fanning him.

I coughed to announce myself, which sent the frightened little novice scurrying away while me and Boopsy Kins sat down over coffee and cookies.

Q. Good afternoon, Boopsy Sedai; thank you so much for humbling our newspaper with an exclusive tell-all. Now, let’s begin. One of the most-asked questions about your most personal life and routine has to be, do your ears hang low?

Boopsy immediately sits up from his sprawl and vehemently replies:

A. Hang low? Like Mistletoe? ARE YOU ACCUSING ME OF KISSING NOVICES AGAIN? I thought we got over that. I was not kissing you! I was… LIES, ALL LIES!

By the time he has finished, foam has gathered at the edges of his mouth and a wild look has entered his eyes… I decide that if I want to leave these quarters alive and not be stuck licking shoe polish for the rest of my immortal Novice life, that it would be a really good idea to move onto another subject. Poring over the noted questions, I find a fairly safe one to ask.

Q. SSssoooo… um… how about this one? If the WT could have one pet other than Bob? What would it be and why?

Switching gears quicker than I could blink, he immediately was bouncing up and down like a little puppy at the idea of this and answered:

A. I would love an ickle Novice as a pet to fetch my slippers, to feed my fish, to entertain me once in a while, to lick my- Whoa, sorry. Drifted away there. *misty eyed*

I fight to maintain my cool Aes Sedai mask of serenity as well as having to forcibly swallow down the bile that had risen in my throat.  Glancing at my notepad again, I decide it’s time to get to the tougher questions… and AWAY from anything that can even remotely involve Novices…..

Q. Tell me, oh wise and all-knowledgeable Boopsy– Bela: Creator? Darkfriend, or just a Two Rivers pony?

Glancing sideways towards a large walk-in closet, that apparently has blue satin curtains instead of doors, he quickly says:

A. I’m going to go for Creator.

Yet my sharp reporter ears picked up quick muttered prayer of “hopes no one found my Bela shrine yet.”  Jotting this down as little tidbit as innocently as possible, I quickly change tactics and hit with curveball.

Q. Now that the Bela mystery is solved… What’s your view on Asmodean’s betrayal to the Forsaken? Cowardly? Brilliant?

Even though Boopsy eventually chose the Blue Ajah, the Brown Ajah has always been a second home to him, and as such, any prospect of something new or an interesting topic as intrigued him. He took his time and formed his answer:

A. Absolutely brilliant! Actually, I always wanted a harp playing pet. You think I could get him onboard?

I interrupt him at this point adding, “Boopsy Kins… He’s dead. Gone. Vanished. Murdered.”

A. He’s dead? Sorry? When did THAT happen? I ummm… never knew.

Now, take note of the shifty eyes, people… and the supposed innocence here. Now why would one who LOVES knowledge NOT know that Asmo had been offed?  Perhaps there is more going on than we all thought…

Q. Final question for the day…(for now) So… How do you do with the guilt?

Faking an obvious look of surprise at this question he stammers for a second and says:

A. Guilt? What guilt? I DID NOT KISS THE NOVICES DANG IT! *sulks* Oh, Asmodean again. What’s with this chick anyway? How’d he die?

Yeah. Right. Likely story. Take a good look at that question, my lovelies. I was just asking about how he dealt with guilt in general… nothing to do with Asmodean… perhaps shock at finding out about his death? or Something else?

Stay tuned for more intrigue, interrogations, blackmail, and juicy details in the next issue of Daes Dae’mar!  Our next subject of interview will be Jason (Dragonmount site owner and erstwhile Dragon Reborn).  If you would like to submit a question for him, please email us at daesdaemar@whitetower.org with the subject line “Casefiles”.  Be sure to include who your question is for!

Crystal Lynn – Signing off <3